A year of healing…rekindling my spirit

We are coming to the ending of another year; 2014 and I’m reflecting on everything that has happened in my life. I really gained momentum towards the end of this year and I am ready now to gallop into 2015 as the horse I am. As I think about how this year has impacted me, I am filled with thankfulness. I stepped up and out of my fears and cleared the space for new pathways. Forgiveness wrapped herself around my heart and others when I opened up about things that had been hurting my soul for too long. Emotional healing took place and filled my Spirit with hope for the future. New relationships began this year and I realized how important human connection is with other kindred spirits and was moved by the authenticity of them. I experienced my first womb massage and energetic cleansing of my womb space. The experience allowed me to really tune into the inherent power I have as a woman and I felt more positively connected with my womb afterward.

 

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I wanted to release anything I had been holding so deep in my center in order to make room for new creativity and all of the potential there is. I thought of how letting go can be so strengthening to the mind, body and spirit even when it is difficult to do so. I had to let go of a lot of things…preconceived notions, relationships, fear, pain, anger and doubt. One doesn’t realize how much they are holding unto until they begin to feel lighter and actually see themselves in a new reality, one that doesn’t allow for baggage. My state of mind needed cleansing as well, from the excess “thoughts” that had taken up way too much space and time. Through affirmations, meditation, writing and finding new ways of communicating authentically, my mind has found healing. There has been doubt, there was hesitation and there was also anxiety as I went through these changes. It is not easy to break patterns that have been a way of life for so long, but it is indeed possible. I knew that in order to allow light to illuminate from within, I had to remove what has been blocking it so that it could shine. I learned more about myself as a woman and my purpose. I evaluated my current relationships and many epiphanies were revealed, much of the past came out in tears and also in anger as stagnant energy was released. The beauty of those moments was that, I could pinpoint why I was so sad, I connected the dots. I owned my emotions and disappointments, not putting myself down for those feelings but embracing myself with just a bit more empathy.  Communication became more important for me, more than it ever has before. Assumptions are bred from ignorance, misunderstandings and not communicating. The more I practiced ways of communicating authentically, the easier it became to express myself. I still have my moments, but I try not to take things so personally when it comes to communication. Time that was spent in the silence of nature so that I could also hear my own voice gave me life. Natures’ music touched my soul in the form of trees rustling, waves splashing, birds calling and serene breezes. There is excitement, anticipation and hope for the new year ahead. I see my path unfolding before me and I am ready to go wherever spirit leads me…

saeedakhtar

Still growing

“I am not my past mistakes.” Lately, I have felt the need to resonate with this mantra, especially when I hear my ego whispering; “haven’t you been down this road before?” But then my spirit counteracts that energy with, “you are not who you used to be; you have grown and are still growing, like a beautiful flower.”

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A place of stillness

Go inside of yourself to that place, that place that holds your heart and spirit together. Bask there, rest there and know that when you feel pure bliss, you are living in truth. These words are shared from me to you, but I am also heeding my own message. I feel like myself in this place, genuine love encompasses me and I feel ready to face my doubts with acute precision. Introspect overtakes me and through the stillness, the peace, the answers come.

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Beautiful new feelings

I am finding it easier and easier to release what doesn’t resonate with me any longer. There is a wave of peace that has overtaken my spirit and given me new visions for my life. I see right now, I see myself blossoming into the goddess I have always wanted to be; independent, loving, artistic, confident in my stance, emotionally and passionately free. Embracing my truest self is the way home and what a beautiful feeling it is.

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Lotus dream

What visual symbol could I use to represent all that I wish to manifest in my life? To me, the symbolic meaning of a lotus flower represents limitless potential in love, life and creativity.

 

Goddess Kali

“A person’s path in life is said to be similar to that of the Lotus. Starting at the seed stage, early in the karmic cycle, through to the bud emerging from the dirty water, representing a person following the path of spirituality and leaving attachment behind, and finally blossoming, this is when a person has become fully awakened and has achieved nirvana.” 

http://www.lotusflowermeaning.net/symbolism.php

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The beautiful lotus has been revered for ages, especially in the East and is also associated with certain Goddesses in Indian, African and Asian cultures. Lately I have been so drawn to this flower and it’s seemingly inherent power. I have felt like its many petals represent the different stages I have moved through in my spirit. I’m also drawn to its symbolism of birth; physical and spiritual rebirth. Spiritual rebirth has welled within me a desire to shed the protective layer, to remove the mask and embrace who I am without fear. I love the lotus flower in that aspect, it really draws me in to its mysteries. As I grow in this new way of embracing myself I am noticing how love, peace and understanding are manifesting new experiences and ways of being. Every petal of the symbolic lotus flower that opens slowly to reveal more truths in my life brings me closer to where I need to be.